Back Track to November

It was in October during my brief visit back in the states that I really noted a problem with my dad. I invited my dad and his wife to accompany me back to Ecuador for a week to see the beach house that Doug and I had purchased a little over a year ago. It's here that I knew something had to be done to procure treatment for my dad.

It was a few months previous to this, that after lengthy discussions with Doug, we decided to put the beach house up for sale and begin showing it to prospective buyers. My reason was health issues with my dad and that I wanted to be closer should he need me for anything. I escorted them home, and returned to Ecuador a week later until mid March 2008. Renting rooms like crazy for the peak times of Carnival and Easter was a breeze and we had one group that had taken the entire house for the month of January.

When I got home, I learned that my dad was scheduled for a needed surgery to remove the tumor that had developed behind his left eye. He went in for the surgery from which he never awakened on March 27, 2008. We closed on the house in Ecuador on Monday, March 31, 2008. So in reality, two chapters closed in my life...one of which had changed my life and the way I look at life forever! The other merely a dream that came true for a season but an experience I'll not soon forget.

Believe it or not, there is a moral to this rhetoric. BE and STAY on good terms with those you love and that love you because not one of us knows when the times to express it all will end! You never realize exactly what you have until you have it no more! Fair to say that my dad and I had a mutual admiration and respect for one another that was never taken for granted and that we parted knowing that the bond of love and family was irrefutably undeterred.

The BRITS ARE COMING AGAIN

Cliff, Sue, Rajan and Ania are coming for three weeks! Summer break for them and a fun time for me as well. Don't know for sure what all is planned...usually nothing...just take it day to day and make the most of each minute we have to share.

Boating, water skiing, beaching, EATING, shopping (for them, the exchange rate is unbelievable) and some educational things. The aquarium in Savannah and the Science Museum would be fun for something different. Perhaps this time, a visit to Sapelo Island would be in order as well.

Whatever, it's certain to be an enjoyable time and the first time we've been together without my dad being a part of the mix. Different in that respect with no doubts!

Time To Heal

Well, a lot has happened since the previous posts. In the midst of the grieving process and adjustments, some pretty horrible things have happened and I've begun to 2nd guess ways that my dad's demise could have been prevented. Since I was only around my dad for brief intervals and noted severe declines in his faculties each time, I've wondered why his wife, around him everyday (when she wasn't entrenched in her other responsibilities) did not make more notice of the situation and make efforts to seek professional assistance long before my demands to do so. It has made me question her loyalty to him and perhaps even put blame at her feet. Is she wholly or in part to blame for a wrongful death? I think she is, especially after learning that my dad had left no will and that she wants the entirety of his estate for herself. Did my dad really not leave a will? Upon vowing to fight for it on the grounds of certainty that my dad would not want me to have nothing, she has placed us in adversarial roles and created animosity where there should be none. Her viscous remarks and comments were unnecessary and way out of line. At least the house, with her allowed to live in it rent free for the remainder of her life, would be in order as I lived in that house with my mom and dad from 11 years to after college in 1982. How could she not believe that I should have the house? How could she attempt to taint the close loving relationship that my dad and I enjoyed? How dare she, who came into my family with nothing but two problematic children, one of which spent the past 15 years in prison expect to have ALL of that which was my dad's (and some of which was my mom's too)?